Autism

Okay, here it is. Grant was diagnosed on the Autism spectrum last week. He saw Dr. Pasquale Accardo at the VCU Medical Center after a six month wait for an appointment. Dr. Accardo is the chair of Developmental Pediatrics at VCU. The appointment started with about a hundred questions detailing Grant's development from birth. Then the Dr. interacted with Grant and finally gave us a diagnosis. He then stayed in the room until we ran out of questions to ask. He was very attentive, informative and caring.

Autism has three defining factors: Speech/Language delays, deficits in social interaction, and obsessive behaviors. Grant has the first two, which classifies him as Pervasive Developmental Delay, Not Otherwise Specified (PDDNOS). He is not classically autistic, which explains why his pediatrician never caught it.

Dr. Accardo noted that Grant is very bright. His cognitive level is way above his capacity to communicate/receive communication from others. That is why he is so drawn to numbers, letters, colors and shapes. You don't need language to understand these concepts. Grant put a shape puzzle together for the doctor during the appointment. Dr. Accardo noted that he functioned during this puzzle on the level of a fifteen year old.

So here's the good news: Grant only had a language delay. His speech and language will eventually catch up. He will never quite even out, but will always improve through out his life. He works with speech therapists now to further improve his language and this will continue. Eventually his language will be like any other child's and he will transition to a child psychologist who can work with him on his social skills. Most likely, he will always be a little off socially. But this can also be improved upon and worked on through adulthood. Grant will succeed in school and go to college. He will live on his own and be able to do anything he wants to. Most likely, he will excel in areas that don't require much social interaction, but will still function in the real world. Grant has the same unlimited potential as any other child.

As far as treatment, medically there is nothing to be done. He is the way he is because of the way his brain is wired. We do not believe in the vaccine connection with Autism, nor to we buy into the diets that are claiming success with autistic children. Neither of these things have been proven scientifically. Please do not try to talk us into them. We have seen great results so far with the wonderful teachers and therapies he has received through the school system. He will continue with his special needs class, inclusion, and speech therapy. Grant will continue to grow and improve as the years go by. Hopefully, by the end of first grade he will be ready to spend most of his time in inclusion. Most likely, he will need assistance of some sort through elementary school and we'll go from there.

We're so proud of Grant. He has grown so much and works so hard every day to do the simple things we don't even think about. He's making more and more eye contact and learning to play more with others. Today he even added the tag-line "Mom" to the end of his sentence to get my attention as in "I have three leaves Mom!" He was so excited to see Blake after school today. He took him by the hand and said: "We have to jump!! Let's slide!! Now let's go on the see-saw! Let's go in the cars Blake!!"

We hope that no one feels sorry for him. In many ways, this is a mixed blessing. Grant is a very sweet boy and most kids are very patient with him. He is unaware of any deficits he has. He is very well-behaved and gets along with other children. His teachers have nothing but praise for him. Although every day we have to work on frustrating things that it seems he should already know, he picks most things up very quickly.

For those of you who don't live by us, this might all seem quite ambiguous. Here's a few things about Grant. He plays through repetition mostly, with a little imagination thrown in. When he's really into something he likes, it's hard to draw him away from it without a fight, but thankfully he isn't extremely tied to routine like classically autistic children. Grant can't tell you what he did this summer or yesterday, or what he wants to be when he grows up. He tends to repeat back to you the question you asked. Right now we're working on "I don't know" as a response instead of repetition. He's afraid of flies and really freaks out when they are around. He doesn't have the language skills to understand that the fly can't harm him. Instead we just try to get rid of the fly or give him somewhere else to go to get away from it. In a large group, Grant is lost a lot. He doesn't have the social/language skills to understand how to tune in to the teacher. In a small group, he performs very well. We still deal with occasional temper tantrums that sometimes happen in public. Many times he can't articulate what is upsetting him. Rather than discipline him sometimes we have to stop and just find out what is upsetting him. It takes awhile, but he usually responds. This is when I wish we had a sign that said: "Stop judging me as a mother. My son has Autism, he doesn't have the skills to communicate effectively sometimes! You do not want to walk a mile in my shoes, so unless you are going to help me, just keep moving."

All that aside, Grant is brilliant. He's been able to count to ten in four different languages since the age of 2. If it's something that interests him and appeals to his visual field, he picks it up very quickly. Grant's very curious about words right now and we expect him to learn to read right along with the other children. He has a happy personality and loves other children, even if he is intimidated by them. We're excited for his future and very grateful for the amazing school system out here.

We often wondered why Travis only got one job offer and why it was to Virginia. When we decided to buy a house in our ward, only two were on the market in our price range and they were both in this school district. We love it here, but have often discussed moving due to the expensive cost of living etc. I have no doubt that we were brought here so that Grant would be in the right place to receive the care and attention that he needs. I am so grateful to live in a country where children with special needs are entitled to the same care and education as regular students. Our school system custom-designed a new class to address the needs of Grant and the other six boys in his preschool class that are about his same level. The teachers have far exceeded my expectations in meeting Grant's needs. They honestly care for him and his progression. From Ms. Post and Ms. Terry in preschool to his current teacher Ms. Stern and even the P.E. teacher Ms. West, they have all constantly sought to push Grant further and stretch him to his highest level of growth.

Our next step is to just keep going. Parenting Grant will be a challenge, but every child pushes us beyond what we think we can do right? I can't wait to see him excel even more through the years. This diagnosis has lifted a weight that Travis and I have carried for three years as we've wondered and worried about Grant's future. It was amazing to hear everything we had hoped for, but never thought could be that good. Grant will do everything we want him to and we love him so much.

Now if only we could work with pediatricians on some sort of early-warning signs of non-classic autism....but that post is for another day.